May 2024 Issue

Finding Focus: Reducing Exam Stress By Living In The Present Moment

With exams looming overhead and the pressures of success weighing you down, you come to realise that this is a pivotal point in your life. It feels like everything is hanging in the balance - the urge to succeed makes it feel like you’re in a life or death situation; however the reality is very different from what you perceive. This is but a single point in your life in which you will be tested and it will have an impact on your life, just as every decision you make on a regular basis, however it doesn’t have to dictate who you are or the quality of your journey. What you have learned along the way to get to this point is far more important than the results you attain in your exams as these are the skills which will help support you in the next stage of your life.

"The present moment is the only moment available to us and is the door to all moments." - Thich Nhat Hanh

Caution: As a professional tutor and mentor, my aim is to offer broad guidance beneficial to most students. However, this advice is not a one-size-fits-all solution. I encourage open discussions with educators and guardians for personalised advice, and I remind readers to consider their unique circumstances when applying suggestions from this newsletter.

Understanding Mindfulness: The Key To Breaking through Anxiety

Mindfulness is your ability to remain present and focused on the here and now. A lot of students lack this ability and resort to distractions via procrastination (i.e. tidying rooms, cooking lunch or helping others) or escape into a virtual reality. One of the primary reasons for this is fear - defined as the anticipation of pain.

Many students have learned to associate cramming with fear due to the degree of uncertainty they face. This uncertainty comes from not knowing what their futures will be and by failing to accept the results of the path they have walked until this point. This inability to accept is usually (not always) stemmed from their desire to feel significant in the eyes of their parent’s / guardians and themselves. This is the fear which students face at the end of every academic year and it is by far the biggest hurdle which stands in their way.

In order to overcome their fears and do well in their exams, students prepare by working hard and refining their skills. Often times, these students who are studying for their GCSEs or in their first year of A-levels, come to realise the importance of studying throughout the year and may push themselves beyond their limits in order to attain the impossible - this is what will cause them the most harm during their study period.

"Nothing can bring you peace but yourself." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Benefits of Presence: Strategies to Improve Mindfulness

Many students who see me are introduced to the concept of presence early on through the books I recommend, notably the power of now by Eckhart Tolle. However for some who have yet to encounter this concept, presence is your ability to surrender to the worries that cloud your mind and to relax. A common symptom of presence is the slowing down of your experience of time. This is in contrast to the effect when students drink too much coffee or use other stimulants as they attempt to excite themselves enough to study.

I have outlined some strategies to improve mindfulness and presence in my previous newsletters and included a few new tools below:

Balance - This is an app that I discovered around January. It is incredibly useful for meditation as it teaches you how to meditate and provides you additional tools which can help you to relax.
Communicating - I would encourage students to spend at least 30 minutes once a week mindfully communicating their worries, pains and inner turmoil with their parents / guardians and be open to receiving advice. Most of the time, this will help to put a lot of your griefs into perspective and free up your mind, enabling you to improve your focus.
Gratitude - Remaining grateful for all that you have and helping other students will aid in your journey to grow, not only in academia but personally as well. I encourage students to identify 3 things which they are grateful for on a daily basis.

"When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." - Lao Tzu

Taking Back Control: Creating Certainty within

A lot of students operate on the limiting mindset of “What if I don’t do well”; “what if this question comes up”; “what if I do well”; “what if I fail my exams”.

What do you notice in the words used in all of these thoughts?

Do these thoughts inspire confidence? Explain.

What could you do differently?

All of these thoughts originate from the uncertainty students feel within and it becomes evident from the phrase “what if”. Just by removing the word “if” from the phrases above, you can begin to see the impact of language on your mental state and begin to find the certainty and confidence needed to tackle exam stress.

"If you aren't in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret." - Jim Carrey

The Challenge

Grab a pen and paper and answer these questions honestly:

What are 3 things causing me the most stress right now?
How can I reframe at least one of those worries into a positive statement using "I will" instead of “if”?
Who can I talk to about my anxieties for support and a fresh perspective?

Take 5 minutes to reflect on these questions. By understanding your worries and reframing them positively, you'll be well on your way to tackling exam stress and regaining control.

"Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor." - Thich Nhat Hanh

Good Luck In Your Exams!

If any of my readers have any questions for me on any of the content covered in this newsletter or otherwise, please feel free to email me.

My email is [email protected]

Mental Health Services

Below is a list of charities which specialise in the mental well-being of teenagers, as such they provide their services free of charge.

Childline: They offer confidential support for individuals under 19, including a free 1-to-1 counsellor chat and email support service. You can call them at 0800 1111 or visit https://www.childline.org.uk/
Kooth: Get free, anonymous online support through chat with counsellors, forums, and articles. Visit https://us.kooth.com/
Samaritans: Call 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/ for confidential emotional support 24/7.
Youngminds: This leading UK mental health charity offers information, support, and resources specifically for young people and their parents. Visit https://www.youngminds.org.uk/

Note: These are but a few of the free services which are readily available for students. You will be able to find many more by simple searching “Mental Health Services for Students” in your search engine. (You can use AI to aid your search as well 😉) .

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